wwdlrd?

is there anything more humbling than seeing your favorite cock rock magistrate minced into youtube fodder? no.




note: give it a minute, your computer isn't broken and the volume is on/up.

jusssss lisin'

when mindy and i were driving down I-55 for Thanksgiving time, i tuned to 88.1 as soon as we closed in on the st. louis area. 88.1 is stl's public radio station and there's usually something good playing. and what did i hear? THE MARINE GIRLS HOLY SHIT! and then lush and then the jesus and mary chain. i didn't even have to hear the dj talk to figure out that this had to be the show Juxtaposition considering the time of the day and the day of the week (late wednesday). Juxtaposition was my saving grace in high school. i didn't have cable so no 120minutes unless i was staying at a friend's house (no offense to those people i friended just so i could sleep over and watch your cable and watch catherine wheel videos... it just had to be done), i had a total of 2 friends in my actual high school that listened to anything remotely interesting, i lived an hour away from the record store which my parent's wouldn't let me go to for fear of getting murdered (again no offense mom and dad for every other weekend that i went there anyway, usually by myself...it just had to be done), and the internet wasn't even in my vocabulary at that point. so this was it. i would tape it as much as i could; 90 minute tapes could only capture so much of a 120 minute radio show. it's unreal how much this show ushered music into my life that i never would have heard that is now so dear i can't imagine life without it. it was soooo varied. i know i have tapes with the bush tetra's, big black, bikini kill, sleater kinney (when they were babies), kmfdm, and the gits on one; dead can dance, cocteau twins, stereolab, nitzer ebb and the fastbacks on another. that's just barely scratching the surface. so anyway...the dj's name is rob and when he starts talking while mindy and i are riding along, he mentions that he's dj'ing a bar called the Royale in st. louis over the weekend. i love his radio show and i love that bar so of course we went, and carson came along too b/c he's a fan as well. long story short...i approached rob and handed over a few requests and OF COURSE i had to pull the whole, "when i was in high school...you played like, meat beat manifesto....and you introduced me to...so thank you for that." we chatted for awhile, he brings over a piece of paper to our table and says to write down whatever i want to hear. carson added a few too. so i looked up the archived shows online and there are two ahows where he plays a bunch of stuff on the request list: december 3rd and december 10th. have a listen.........

http://www.kdhx.org/index.php?option=com_kdhxradio&task=playlist&dothis=latest&show=Juxtaposition&Itemid=268

(there's a few minutes of garbage before his actual show starts)

for your wishlist

http://www.amazon.com/Factory-Records-Communications-1978-1992/dp/B001E1GXP0/ref=sr_1_27?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1229403974&sr=1-27

thanksgiving

one row of grandpa's ("pac-aw" if i was 5) tractor "museum".

minders

mandatory strawberry jello pretzel salad. i didn't indulge, obviously.

grandma's tunes.

grandpa's new pet rabbit, carl.

grandpa's new dog. it was dumped in the front yard.

she loves the n-bomb but voted for obama. i love my grandma. (also has fierce macular degeneration and i've never heard her complain once, even when we joke that the mashed potatoes are way salty b/c she can't see how much salt she's putting in.)

hot finds

i couldn't even enjoy my omlette.

winter staple

two packages of mixed "fancy" baby romas.diced.

four regular roma tomatoes.diced.

one yellow onion.diced.

two tbs of balsamic vinegar

one tbs of dried oregano

two tbs of olive oil

10 cloves of garlic.pressed.

roast in a casserole dish for an hour @350. mix periodically. run through a blender or food processor to make a puree.

tomato lentil soup:

take two cups of roasted tomato puree and one cup of water (more if you like it more soupish than stewy...you judge the proportions) and bring to a boil. bring down the heat, add 1/4 cup red lentil, salt and pepper and let simmer for 20 minutes or until the lentils are tender.

one of a million things you can do with this tomato puree. it's awesome mixed in with quinoa and some steamed asparagus and a squeeze of lemon.

check that one off.

i just did a 3 (was going for 4) day liquid fast/detox/cleanse. and i feel great!

i made a broth and an "apple pie" fiber drink per jae steele, the author of that amazing holistic vegan cookbook i can't put down. here's the link:
http://domesticaffair.blogspot.com/2006/01/food-what-food.html

will probably do this 3-4 times a year.

i was supremely focused, both on the fast and my everyday business. kind of suprised by that. got a lot done including some new coin purses, but that might have been accelerated by the Orange Juice and Repulsion cds on repeat for the whole 3 days.

painkiller catkiller

last weekend could not have turned out more off course. for one...my motivation to do much of anything took a hike to "bah"sville. for two...my cat tried to eat a tab of aleve. let me say aleve, in any dose or even one licks worth, is trouble for a cat. thankfully, instead of swallowing/eating it, she's okay as she merely licked the tab, which i found 10 steps away from where i placed it on the counter. so we have potential consequential stomach ulcers as opposed to KIDNEY FAILURE had she ingested the whole thing so she's on meds for awhile to keep the ulcers at bay.

let's see, i had grandiose plans for friday which turned into a grandiose 10 hour nap. missed 18th dye, saved laundry and that whole laundry ritual for the next day, did not wish matt sears a happy birthday in person. not happy bout any of this.

saturday came and i didn't get my haircut or do the suburban sister thing per usual. this is where the horrifying cat episode came in. did you know it's $60 to call animal poison control? saw Midnight, slightly disappointed? probably because i was standing in front of the bass amp the whole time so i wasn't getting the full picture. limp crowd reaction when questioned, "are there any loose women out there?" at least matt raised his hand. baby got her first legit back patch. hung out with bry, sarah, leary, song and The Leg (quality folks!!) and got matt home to sleep off a combo hangover and virus.

sunday i didn't do anything etsy related like planned. went to the Renegade holiday sale for awhile and tackled some xmas shopping while there. bought myself a necklace with a glass bauble containing a big orange squid in a sea of violet, trying to not perpetuate this nature and darkness theme i've had for awhile. though a squid is definitely a natural object that lives in the darkest parts of the known world. FAIL. matt took me out for a premature birthday dinner at Green Zebra. any angsty b.s. i had about that place, be it yuppie disdain or socioecon animosity, is GONE. best meal i've ever had, hands down. when you have 20 ingredients and 6 prep methods going into one beet salad, you best bet it's 12.00 instead of 4.00. it's a luxury and i'll indulge if my wallet allows. i was gifted an incredible japanese dayplanner with a companion recipe book that has space reserved for pictures and serving size and cost and other neat details that only the japanese would think of. i believe my bday card said something about being a "fiery muse" but i was crying and all when i got to that part and it's hard to read through a coating of tears. watched dancer in the dark and jesus camp. these are happy, happy films!

happy holiday cramming

Friday. i've started a routine where if a band i intend to see is playing the Bottle, i save the day of the show for laundry day. that way i can do my laundry next door, throw it in my car when i'm done and head to the show. it works nicely. tonight i'm washing almost 2 months worth and then going to see 18th Dye. i haven't heard their new record and frankly i'm shocked they reformed. but man i love Done, an early 90's Matador gem that doesn't get enough attention IMO. then meeting up with pals to celebrate the 27 rotten years that matt sears has been alive. i can't believe we ever had a problem with each other. wait yes i can. we were dumb, bored kids.

Saturday. takes photos of the huge pile of stuff i have for etsy. my thanksgiving trip home, and to my favorite thrift stores, proved fruitful so i have a lot of stuff to shoot. maybe try to work on some new patterns for coin purses? then head out to the burbs for a haircut and color. i won't lie, i love this little beautification routine. drive out the burbs, listen to some cds i haven't heard in awhile, have a coffee, talk to myself, try not to kill myself on I-88, get to mindy's mind-blowing salon, hang with my sister and simultaneously get an awesome cut and usually get some food after. heading back to the city and finally seeing MIDNIGHT for free at cobra (which i still think feels like a ski lodge. not hating though). i'm practically nervous about it. if i didn't have so much on my plate right now, i think matt and i would've had our "endless sluts" jackets ready in time. someone will probably leave pregnant or on fire or both.

Sunday. hoping i can finally meet up with amy smiles and have her model for me for etsy. i've got to find a new place to shoot since it's 3 degrees out now. also hoping to put up at least 10 new things on etsy. (send out my resume to a few more places). maybe try to stop by renengade's holiday sale and/or de-part-ment. dinner at mana b/c matt is a mind reader and knows that good vegetarian tapas around the corner will calm me down a bit.

i'm actually thrilled that life is so buzzy lately. i've bailed, for various reasons, on so many recent things that i got kind of disappointed about it. to remind myself to not get in that habit, here is the list of potentially good times i missed out on:
-darker my love
-neil halsted
-wilderness
-akron/family
-no age
-sisters going to the sadie's
-reading from chris connelly and jolene siana

don't do that again!

hi mom.

for technicality's sake, i'm not a gen-x'r. i'm a y, i think. maybe an x/y cusp?

i'm sending this to my mom. my mom who doesn't understand how white 40-and-unders made a black man their president. to my dad, who can't bare how much i sound like him during the Nam era until he came to realize "how the world works". my folks removed themselves in so many ways to not have to think about these things anymore and as a result they've become imprisoned in misconception via entertainment "news". self-preserved in a dangerous way out of retaliation to a generation that left their hope stranded or buried. this article is much more about parents who maintained the peace and love ideals of the 60's, which my parents left in the dust. but i'll be damned for trying to make them go back and pick it up.

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2008/11/07/havrilesky/

moss covered heart

first ever sister's vacation. first ever presence in the pacific northwest.

made it through security and if it weren't for my cute sister and these cute kid's chairs keeping my mouth at bay, i would've probably made a scene over the zappos.com sponsored security bins for the post-9/11 x-ray machine. i don't care if you make it somehow easy to shop through 8 billion pairs of shoes and come out with some real lookers, zappos.com. i don't need a friendly reminder to buy new shoes while i'm unloading my dirty old ones and standing in my socks, annoyed at the excessive, expensive "protection" before me. it's like Trojan endorsing the rapist who was kind enough to wear a condom. gee thanks and fuck you.

rental Prius with GPS and lots of fresh and clear whizzing by us on our way out of Seattle. northbound to the Bellingham, Washington area. btw, it took at least a half hour to figure out which "buttons" to push to get the Prius out of the actual rental lot.

we had no set time to be in Bellingham so, being back road country kids at heart, we took a bunch of detours off the highway and saw what was to bee seen.

made it to Bellingham in the late afternoon after driving a coastal, winding road with textbook "dramatic views". wish i would've taken more photos but i was pretty preoccupied with being a hippie and feeling a lot.

waiting for us in Bellingham were Mindy's bosses, a married couple, who recently sold their salon internally and up and moved within one week to this wonderland. i love these people so much. they don't wait for shit. when the universe calls, they hear it and they act. they do what they have to do, with consideration and kindness and urgency and that perfect brand of healthy selfishness.

we took a walk around the neighborhood and found that the trees were shedding leaves as big as plates. so p.j. gathered a bunch for a table setting later that night (not to eat off of, for decoration).

p.s. the woman fell 15 feet off of her front porch the previous day and busted herself up badly yet smiled the whole time, just concerned that her makeshift scarf sling matched her outfit. did i mention she has terminal cancer and has as much spirit as downtown Chicago on Nov. 4, 2008 but on EVERY DAY?

next day we headed up to Vancouver. john is UK born but lived most of his life in Vancouver. something like 30 years. so nutty to hear stories about trading haircuts for shoes with John Fluevog when they were both just starting out. "old friends".

we ate at a really good restaurant that follows the rule that price and portions are inversely proportional.

next morning, our last before we broke for Seattle.

hanging out on the front porch.

went to a bakery cafe with pumpkin cookies so good i took down the address and phone # to have them sent to me. fiesta wear and john being john.

they promised us a hike before we left. ferns as big as beds at every turn. heaven on earth is overwhelmingly green.

before we left i had to take a picture of our results from pulling and reading our "animal cards" the night before. some real nu new aging going on. i don't take this stuff as bonded word, but it's nice to pick out an aspect of you life, say new friendships or your job, and sit on it for a minute; see if it needs some work or attention.

my cards suggested that my creative well was about to run over and to stop resting on ideas and make them reality. animal god knows i'm trying. mindy bid a proper farewell.

spent the next 2 days in and around seattle. after being REALLY annoyed with obnoxious bar patrons in the area near out hotel (like some really offensive dickheads and angry lesbians yelling at me that skinny people fucking suck), mindy and i went to a pretty interesting brew pub. yummy raspberry ales. of course this was after i romanticized the idea of going to the Comet, which left us really under wowed in under 30 seconds, even with some Wipers playing. 16-ish years too late i guess. though, according to seattle radio, grunge did NOT die with Andrew Wood. it is, in fact, alive and well.

view outside the hotel window.

farmer's market where you can buy power tools, organic fruits and veggies and cute clothes.

wound up having $1 scooners of beer at this perfect little bar. the tile on the walls (through the door) is original and not kitchy reproduction.

appropriate given our hilarious bar maid.

last morning. headed down to the market. picked up giant vegan cookies for the plane ride home.

minders. wearing the neil diamond 84 tour shirt she bought at the flea market from the portly, middle-aged gay couple that bickered like All in the Family. fitting all around.